Wild, bushy, fluffy, thick, curly, ginger, beautiful. All words used to describe my hair over the years. So much of my identity in those many…… many strands.
If I lose it, do I lose my identity?
Of course not. As a friend kindly pointed out, I am much more than my hair or my boobs. I am tough, loyal, giving, a team player, a parent, a wife, a daughter, a sister and a friend. All of which I can do with or without hair.
For my husband, he has seen many transitions through my hairstyles, from quite severely short, to mid length, to long and back to mid length. This will just be another phase.
However, my hair ritual has always been very important to me. I have attended the same salon every six weeks, for sixteen years!! It isn’t just about my hair itself, it’s about the routine as my sister pointed out. The chat, the magazines, the cup of tea, the head massage and the connections are just as important as what is being done to my hair.
So today I went for my last full hair experience before chemo. Cut, colour, massage, blow dry and style. Plus the chat, magazine, tea, hugs and pamper. The girls made me feel special and today’s experience made me come to a decision.
I will fight for my hair, but I won’t put myself through hell to save it.
I have been deliberating over whether to try the cold cap offered to some chemo patients. The idea is to take the scalp temperature right down and constrict the blood vessels, reducing the amount of drug reaching the hair follicles. It is exactly what it sounds like, and means enduring an ice cream headache possibly for the duration of treatment (around three hours). Although some say after 15 minutes you go numb. It may or may not work.
So, I’ve had a chop to get good scalp contact and I’ll give it a try. If it doesn’t work or is too unbearable ………… well bald will just be my next phase.
One thing is for sure, hair or not, I can still go to the salon every six weeks for a massage, cuppa and a chat. I’ll be welcomed with open arms and it will help me to feel ‘normal’
Ax
The BooBee Journey 