rest – The BooBee Journey

Treatment 4: The bell ringing

Today was the best day! I cannot begin to explain what a relief it is to know that chemo is behind me. No matter what happens next, I am through the worst of it.

The day started with our ritual giggle about the weird hat in the waiting room. I think I like this style the best 🤣 Without fail we laugh until we cry. I will miss this part of chemotherapy!

From there we headed to the dreaded weighing station (I won’t miss that) and then into my treatment room. My communications whiteboard greeted me with the message below, it put a smile on my face right away. The chemo nurses are so lovely and empathetic, they always know what to do, say or write.

The treatment itself went well and the kids turned up just in time for the bell ringing ceremony. They insisted on being there and it was lovely to share the celebration with them (most of you will have seen the video on Facebook). What a moment it was, the camera didn’t catch the tears in my eyes.

From there, we headed to The Parade Hotel for a celebration lunch. All smiles and one of the few times I’ve seen Charlie not finish a meal!

It’s been such a journey, but the kindness and support I have received has been unbelievable and I feel very lucky to be a part of such a great community and to have wonderful family and friends. Nikki has been my rock through chemo and I love her to bits for being there at the shitty times.

So now I rest and then in three weeks I find out what’s next. The journey is not over but I am confident the worst part is. We await the genetic test results and I already know hormone blockers are on the horizon. More side effects to negotiate, but that’s ok if it saves my life.

Thank you to every one of you for following my journey and providing support. You don’t know how much strength it gives me.

Treatment 2 – The measles one

So here I am for treatment number 2, the soldiers are back in my body and on their cancer finding mission.

It has been an interesting couple of days with a measles outbreak in Bunbury hospital. This means more hoops and complications (as if chemo isn’t enough). N95 masks for patients and surgical masks for support people. Feels like Covid all over again.

Back to my hair…..my moulting got worse and worse until on Saturday I filled the plug hole in the shower. I questioned the cold cap and wondered whether it was best to just get on with what seemed like the inevitable. Just shave it off and be done with it. The clippers came out and I burst into tears. My husband pointed out that although I had lost a lot, I still had enough. There are no bald patches, it is just thinned. We decided one more try of the cap.

I walked into the oncologist’s office this morning and the first thing she said was “Wow, look at your hair, you must be using the cold cap”. Ha, so it is working!!

We did it again and what a difference. I realise now my hair was so thick at the first treatment, the cold cap didn’t feel that bad because I had a layer of insulation!! At this treatment it felt much colder (but I still coped fine). Hopefully this means a better result…… and I ended up with icicles!!

Icicles and lots of hair left in the cap 😥

Again, I didn’t find the treatment too bad. Having the cold cap makes it a much longer day and they were under the pump in the unit so running behind. But that’s ok, we had plenty to do. We started planning a birthday party, had a visit from a colleague and chatted about the kids. I tried to snooze at one point but there was too much background noise (like people talking to family on speaker phone 😳).

And…….. we found the crazy hat. We still do not understand what it is or how you are supposed to wear it, but it makes us laugh so hard….. and when you are sitting in a chemo ward, laughs are hard to come by.

Watch out for the Dumbo look at treatment 3.

Now, I just take it easy for a few days and let the soldiers do their thing. I can preempt some of the side effects this time so it should be a bit easier. And the good news…… 2 down, 2 to go……. half way 🎉

Treatment 1: The aftermath

So far so good. It’s only day 3, so I’m not getting too excited yet. I feel very chemical……. I’m excreting it, exhaling it and crying it. I can feel it everywhere.

I am going to describe something that will likely make me sound a bit crazy but bear with me, it’s just because I am a visual person…..

A few weeks ago, I described to a friend about how antibiotics are like a little cleaner man, running around your body, sweeping germs out of the corners. Well….. if that was my analogy, then chemotherapy is like having an army inside you. They have guns, tear gas, grenades and other chemical warfare. They are running, ducking and weaving. Diving and rolling. Searching and searching.

I am not a person who believes in war, except in this case. My body is at war and I am encouraging those soldiers to get the job done. Find any little runaway cells, the rouges and defectors and kill them dead, in whichever manner they need to.

From the outside, I am still looking and feeling ok. A bit bloated from steroids and tired looking, but I am getting on with my days. The macrame orders are coming along nicely and I am resting when needed. I managed a 20 minute walk last night.

More than anything I am staying positive. This little blip in the road will not get me down. It will make me stronger. Cancer, you picked the wrong person to mess with.

But, I’m not going to pretend I feel this positive all the time. I had a moment last night, where I suddenly felt acutely aware not only of the chemicals inside me, but of the tissue I’ve lost. I shed a few tears. It was the first time I’ve mourned the part of me that is gone forever.

I haven’t written about the surgery I chose, simply because I believe everyone should make their own decisions. Every breast cancer, the circumstances surrounding it and the person fighting it, are different. I would not want to sway anyone. My choice and reasonings, belong only to me. I have alluded to it along the way, but I won’t share the complete details on this forum (happy to talk or private message though).

Anyway, I’m all good and just plodding along gently.