Diagnosis – The BooBee Journey

Finding the lump

I’m going to step back a bit and tell you how I found my nasty little cancer. Being in the industry it would be remiss of me not to….

I have had biannual mammograms since I was 40. I always practiced what I preached. But, prior to that, my breasts were troublesome. The first biopsy I had was back when I was at university, we were studying mammography and I found a lump. I had an ultrasound and a fine needle aspiration (FNA). It showed nothing abnormal, but the lump remained.

After having my first child and while breast feeding, I found another lump. Ultrasounds and another FNA identified a blocked duct. Phew. For a decade or so my breasts behaved.

Then, in my late 30s I had a third ultrasound. I can’t remember if I found another lump or if the doctor just sent me for an ultrasound because they were lumpy. This ultrasound was interesting.

Machines and resolution had improved so much and the sonographer was able to determine that the first lump (from back at uni) was a lymph node sitting in my breast. A slightly unusual place for a node but nothing to worry about and finally an explanation for my lump. She also found cysts, and lots of them.

Once I started having mammograms my report always said that I had dense breasts. It recommended I see the GP who, given my history, routinely sent me for an ultrasound. Several times, this lead to more biopsies of complex cysts.

In the industry we would say that I had ‘busy’ breasts. I was every sonographer’s worst nightmare, locating, comparing and documenting multiple cysts is never fun.

18 months ago I had my mammogram as normal, followed by an ultrasound. Everything seemed stable and no biopsy was needed. They were their usual ‘busy’ selves.

Given the nature of my breasts, I always found self examination difficult. My breasts were full of lumps and bumps. But, on a regular basis I tried my best. In November 2024, I felt something unusual. It was much harder than the rest of my tissue, sitting deep to the inferior aspect of my nipple, about the size of a small grape.

For a few weeks I continued to feel it. Then I scanned myself (ultrasound). What I saw was not an obvious cancer but an unusual area, in fact I had never seen anything like it. Still I waited. I scanned myself again. No change.

I went to the GP who agreed she could feel something. She referred me for a ‘proper’ ultrasound and told me it was time to step out from being an imaging professional and into the patient role. Gulp.

I was super busy with work, finishing a tafe course, and general family life. It took me a little while to co-ordinate a time with my colleague (she offered to stay back late, come in early, work through lunch whatever it took…… but I was busy). Finally I got there, 2 days before Christmas. My colleagues were amazing, I went from ultrasound to contrast mammogram to biopsy in one afternoon. By the end of the day, I knew. I didn’t have pathology results, but I knew.

If you’ve been reading my blogs you’ll know the torment of the waiting over Christmas and all I could think was…….. Amber, you could have done this weeks ago but you were too ‘busy’.

I know many women find themselves in this situation, putting themselves last on their list of priorities. I don’t know how we change, but this has been an illustration of why we shouldn’t do it. It’s also an illustration of the value in knowing your own body and using all of the resources out there to detect cancer early.

I got it early, but I will always think, I could have got it earlier if I, and my breasts weren’t so dam ‘busy’.

Glossary:

Cyst – fluid filled pocket. Benign, very common, particularly around peri-menopause.

Dense breasts – breasts that have a higher percentage of fibro-glandular breast tissue compared to fat. This type of breast is normal and relatively common, but it does increase the risk of breast cancer. It also makes mammograms more difficult to read. But, this does not mean mammograms are not valuable with this type of breast, they most certainly are. Some cancers can only ever be detected on mammograms.

For more information on dense breasts click here:

https://www.breastscreen.health.wa.gov.au/Breast-screening/Dense-breasts

Missing out – Jetty swim 2025

Warning: This one is a tear jerker….

One of my biggest fears after diagnosis was what I might miss out on this year. Would it effect holiday plans, events with the kids and swimming? An early realisation was ………I would have to miss the 2025 Busselton Jetty Swim. It would be the first time in 15 years I wasn’t out there.

This was particularly devastating for me. It is an event that I am so passionate about. Over the years I have done many solo swims (3.6km) but I have also swum it in duos and teams. These were because I wanted to share this beautiful event with those I love and the kids I coached.

In recent years, I had done the mile, once escorting a beautiful friend and last year because I missed out on a solo entry. Incidentally, that turned out to be one of my most competitive swims, finishing 4th in the old lady’s division!

It never mattered to me which way I was swimming it as long as I was in there. I’ve watched the men and women in their 70s and 80s, blind and disabled. Families, friends and couples achieve their goals. And then there are the people that have overcome huge challenges just to be there. It is so inspiring. The swim’s tagline is ‘everybody’s swim’ and that’s exactly what it is.

Yesterday was the day. I planned to sit at home and have a nice breakfast and look forward to 2026. But a part of me knew there would be an awful lot of ‘poor me’ going on in my brain.

But then my army stepped forward….

The people I had encouraged and hopefully inspired along the way, stood up and did it for me (of course they had their own reasons but I know they were thinking of me). From our friends that meet us for early morning swims in the shark net, to the friend I meet weekly at Yallingup lagoon, to kids I’ve coached, to my friend who had been building her way up to a full solo and overcoming injury……. to my beautiful and courageous son.

They did it for themselves and me.…… and the conditions were horrendous.

For my boy, it was a last minute decision. He hadn’t trained, an ex competitive swimmer who had lost the love. A spot came up and being a lifeguard at the pool, he had listened to the swim coach’s preparations and tips for his squad and he thought…… I can do that.

As a parent, there are many proud moments but I’m not sure anything will top this one for me. It hurt him like hell and as I say the conditions were crap, but he kept going.

His one request was that I was at the finish line. It was a bit of an effort, but of course I got there and this was my reward…

It turns out the 2025 (30th Busselton jetty swim) will be one of the most memorable. As a wise person in my family said ‘I could not have handed the baton to a more reliable person’

And the challenge is set….

He told me last night, he’s training for the solo next year and he’s going to beat me.

Bring it on!!

Finding strength

Many people have commented on how strong I have been throughout the ordeal to this point. They ask me how I’m doing it. The answer is quite simple. It’s all about knowledge.

I know this disease. I know how it works, the different types, surgical options, surgical outcomes, other treatment options and recommendations. Through my work, I have literally studied this information to qualify and then seen it over and over.

For this reason, I was able to make quick, clear decisions about what I needed and wanted. I was in the drivers seat. It is the single biggest difference between myself and the average patient in my situation. It is something that you cannot give or recommend or offer to other patients, because it took me 25 years working in the industry in Australia, NZ and the UK to gain it.

What I’m saying is………. only someone with my knowledge could have even attempted to have the strength and clarity I’ve had. I can tell you now, any other cancer diagnosis and it would have been a very different story.

I guess the only thing I could say to others, is to get as much information as you can, then take your time (within reason of course) to make your decision. Having some level of control over your treatment makes a big difference.

For me, there will be other challenges which I will continue to write about. I have experienced several. Writing about them is me processing, dealing with and then moving forward from each one as they arise. I recently discovered how important this process is.

Facing reality

I’m still finding it hard to accept I have cancer. I have spent 15 of my 25 year career, finding breast cancers. Then I found mine. That wasn’t how it was supposed to go. Although sometimes I think….. maybe I always knew it was going to happen and then I wonder….. is this what my career was actually about?

I mean let’s face it, in Australia 1 in 7 women will develop breast cancer in their lifetime. The odds are pretty high, unfortunately. Even with no family history. Then there is my dense breasts, my propensity towards being a stress head, liking a drink, taking hormones etc.

Did I do this to myself?

But that is not what this is about. No good can come from blame when it comes to cancer. I know that. Yet, somehow I still went down that rabbit hole.

It’s been almost a month since the radiologist said “I think this is malignant Amber”. I can only just put into words how I am feeling and all my friends know….. I have lots of words. It isn’t often I am speechless!

I feel cheated, I feel pissed off, I feel angry but I also feel resigned, I feel positive, I feel like kicking this thing to the kerb and I will. I feel like demonstrating how well this can go, like finding the positives in the shit storm.

This will be the story of my BooBees, from the inside and outside.